If I keep applying for food stamps every week, maybe they’ll order me a pizza just to shut me up.
"Why don't you call that place downtown, they're supposed to help people in your situation."
"I already called them a couple of weeks ago. They don't actually help people like me, they said I don't meet their eligibility requirements."
"Well, why don't you call them again?"
"...Yeah, and while I'm at it, why don't I keep opening the door of the fridge every fifteen minutes in case something new materializes in there since the last time I checked?"
"I'm not offering you any more help since you refuse to help yourself."
"Hey, you want a Diet Coke? I didn't have any a minute ago, but I'm heading back to the kitchen and I've got a really good feeling that things are going to be different this time."
"I already called them a couple of weeks ago. They don't actually help people like me, they said I don't meet their eligibility requirements."
"Well, why don't you call them again?"
"...Yeah, and while I'm at it, why don't I keep opening the door of the fridge every fifteen minutes in case something new materializes in there since the last time I checked?"
"I'm not offering you any more help since you refuse to help yourself."
"Hey, you want a Diet Coke? I didn't have any a minute ago, but I'm heading back to the kitchen and I've got a really good feeling that things are going to be different this time."